7 Years, 3 Kids, One Breastfeeding Journey
Happy Breastfeeding Month to all the milky mommas out there. This breastfeeding journey can look different for every mom.
Some are just beginning, some are in the long nights, and some are learning how to let it end. Every version is real and deserves to be seen.
I have been on this breastfeeding journey for seven years. Not straight through, but close enough that it feels like one long chapter in my life. Three kids, short gaps between pregnancies, and a lot of nights where I felt like I was the only person awake in the entire world.
It has been sweet. It has been frustrating. It has been painful. And it has been one of the biggest parts of my motherhood.
When I Thought My First Would Wean… But She Didn’t
When my first was born, I had to go back to work. She was mixed fed, taking formula when I was gone and nursing when I got home. I thought she would stop when she turned one. She did not.
When I got pregnant with my second, I thought for sure she would wean. She didn’t. Even with my growing belly, she kept nursing like nothing had changed. I caught myself asking what so many new moms ask: when will my milk come in? With her, it happened after a few days, but waiting felt endless.
Tandem Feeding and a New C-Section Scar
When my second was born, my eldest still wanted to nurse. That meant tandem feeding two children while recovering from a C-section. It was exhausting in ways I cannot fully explain. My body was sore, my patience was gone, and yet I still showed up for both of them.
I did that for more than a year before the pandemic hit. Going back to work finally ended my eldest’s breastfeeding journey, and I was down to feeding just one child.
The Toddler Who Could Not Let Go
My second child was determined. If she saw me, she wanted to feed. I started wanting her to stop when she turned four because she had developed a habit of biting when she got sleepy. Not on purpose, but enough to make me shout in pain.
When I found out I was pregnant again, I finally convinced her it was time to stop. I thought I would feel nothing but relief. And I did. But there was also a quiet ache in my chest knowing her part of my breastfeeding journey was over.
My Last Baby
My third baby is my last. I had my fallopian tubes removed, so there is no maybe one more. This is the final chapter of my breastfeeding journey, and I feel it every time I sit down with my son.
I do not know how long we will keep going. I do know this will be the hardest goodbye, because it will be the last time I will ever do it.
Looking Back on My Breastfeeding Journey
Feeding a Newborn is Relentless
Those early weeks feel like a blur. I worried about how much breast milk a newborn really needs, but it turned out to be less than I expected. Watching diapers and weight gain gave me more peace than counting ounces ever did.
No Timer on a Feeding Session
As my babies grew, they became faster and more efficient, but sometimes they lingered for comfort.
I learned there is no strict rule for how long a newborn should breastfeed. Some sessions were quick, some stretched on, and each of my kids had their own rhythm.
The Real Advantages of Breastfeeding
Even on the hardest nights, I saw the advantages of breastfeeding. It was food and comfort wrapped into one. People often highlight the benefits for the baby, but the breastfeeding benefits for the mom are real, too.
For me, it helped with recovery, lowered stress on certain days, and gave me moments of connection I will never forget.
That said, I know feeding looks different for every family. Formula feeding and combination feeding are just as real, just as loving, and come with their own challenges and strengths.
Pain is Part of the Story Too
Tenderness at the start can be normal, but sharp or ongoing pain meant something needed to change.
Sometimes it was a shallow latch. Sometimes it was cracked skin. And sometimes it was those little teeth that bit down and had me yelping.
The Bittersweet Ending I Know Is Coming
Breastfeeding has been messy, emotional, and a test of patience. It has been a lifeline on hard days and a quiet comfort on better ones. It has connected me to my children in a way nothing else has.
When this last baby weans, I know it will feel like the end of an era. I will finally have my body completely back to myself for the first time in nearly a decade.
But I will also miss the way his small hand rests on me, the way his eyes slowly close as he feeds, and the silent connection that happens in those moments. It is the kind of ending that will hurt and heal at the same time.
Happy Breastfeeding Month again to all the milky mommas. However you feed your baby, the love is the same. Every journey matters.
Mommy Ces
Mom of three, figuring things out one day at a time. I write about the real parts of motherhood, the messy days, the little wins, and all the in-betweens that don’t always make it to Instagram. This space is a mix of stories, reflections, and reminders that you're not alone.
